Other Stuff

All I wrote about was cancer. But cancer isn't the only thing in my life.

I bought myself a nice present before leaving Bloomingdale's: white with violet lenses Gucci aviators. My favorite! I needed a pre-treatment present.

I had lunch with my friend Bertha while she was here. Again, I felt a little guilty because I couldn't go out and party with her but she understood why. It was great to see her, she's as cute as ever!

Clay and I are..... working on being friends. And it's working. He came to see me at the hospital Wednesday and that was nice.

My friend Jorge just got engaged and that was enough to spur a flurry of phone calls to and from my nearest and dearest, lol. I can look forward to another wedding, lol.

My other friend Adri wants to come visit me but we haven't been able to set a date for her to come. The thing is, I don't want her to come on days when I have to go to treatment or when I don't feel well because of it. And the whole month of August is out. I'm hoping maybe the beginning of September might be best. She wants to come to see me and bring me some Adri magic when I feel down...... I have really good friends.........

I'd like to call everyone who has called me the last couple of months but sometimes, I just don't feel like being on the phone. I feel guilty because I know I should return their calls and I'm just being lazy. Well, I have lots of time again so there will be plenty of opportunities.

My poor cat is traumatized. I'm pretty sure the doctors are gonna tell me it's time to limit my interactions with her. However, she's used to being around me and in my room, it's where her food and kitty litter are. She also sleeps with me at night, usually at the foot of the bed or next to my back. In anticipation of my doctor's orders, I made plans with my brother Sergio to take her but she wasn't very happy about that. We moved her food and litter out of my room but she refuses to leave. She hides under the bed and won't come out. When she does and we try to take her to Sergio's room, she flips out and claws and cries. Everyone tells me to just lock her out of my room and let her cry, but I can't! Poor thing, this is uprooting her sense of stability and order. So, I'll let her have access to my room but her food and litter will be kept in another room closer to mine so that the proximity will comfort her. But she's not allowed on my bed or in my room at night. Jeez my cat drama!

I've been really lucky to have my mom around. She's definitely much more involved this time and it's just so comforting to feel taken care of like that again. One of the last days I worked, she took me to work and dropped me off across the street. She'd packed me a lunch so I had it in one hand and my tote bag in another. I crossed the street, had my lunch bag in one hand, and was adjusting my purse with the other. I turned around one last time to look for her and see if she was still there. She was and she was watching me so I waved and she waved back before leaving. And it just hit me, this feeling of being a little girl again, with my mom dropping me off at school with my lunch and my backpack, and I turn around with uncertainty one last time, just to reassure myself that she's still there, and she is and it comforts me. That's how I felt. It was such a poignant and touching moment. I guess that's how I feel. Like this little girl who looks to her mother to protect her and love her. She gives me strength when mine's starts to falter. Oh my goodness, I think I'll stop because now I'm getting choked up. I love my mom and words cannot express how much her love carries me now.

So for the next couple of weeks, it's rest, rest, rest!