Day Zero

So how cool is this? I'm blogging from my hospital bed at City of Hope Hospital in Duarte, CA.

And yup, today was Day Zero! I got my stem cells back today.

So much has happened since I last wrote. Basically the fevers stuck around for 10 days and then they mysteriously left. They took out my port but neglected to tell me they left the wound open because they thought it was infected so imagine my surprise the day after when a nurse changes the dressing and I've got a gaping wound in my chest. It has since healed and there's a slightly ugly scar left but I've discovered the powers of Mederma (scar cream) so I'll be using it on the scar. Then I did my last round of salvage chemo. Then I had a Hickman catheter put in, which is the type of catheter they need for the transplant. Then they collected my stem cells for 8 days and finally I checked into the hospital this last Tuesday.

Yesterday, Wednesday, they gave me that high dose chemo (which I slept through). And today they gave me half of the stem cells that they collected. It turns out I'll be doing this transplant 2 times. This being the first one and then I come back the beginning of October for transplant #2. This time I'll be in the hospital for 2-3 weeks and the second time for 3-5 weeks. And then hopefully not at all! So basically I'm here so that they can keep an eye on me to make sure I don't get too sick. I feel fine now but they said it'll change in a few days so we'll see.

My room is pretty sweet. I'm definitely hooked up in the entertainment material. I have my ipod, portable DVD player, a stack of magazines, a trashy novel, a nice TV in the room, and for now my sister's computer with internet access. They even have a low impact exercise class for patients that are well enough to take it. And my siblings come visit with boardgames that we all definitely get into. So all in all, it's not so bad. All of these things do a great job of distracting me from the stuff that's going on around me.

I'm slowly getting there. I'm in the middle of this transplant and then it's just one more.

One gross detail. So the preservative they use on my stem cells smells like garlic creamed corn! And when they were giving them back to me, I could taste it in my mouth....... it was absolutely awful, thank God it only lasted like half an hour. So yeah, garlic creamed corn, just thought I'd share that.........

On another note, my brother Sergio got a motorcycle like a month ago and today was in a motorcycle accident. I haven't seen him but my mom assures me he's ok, just scraped up. It was a little crazy, I was in my hospital and then my mom calls to tell my sister and I that she's across town in another one with my brother. My poor parents.....

My sister came home from Seattle and she has totally been everywhere with me. I've missed her laughter and witty humor. She leaves next Monday and........ I'll miss her terribly.

Today I spoke to 2 friends of mine from Ithaca, Angie and Christina. They told me they were going to Las Vegas next year sometime between January and April. If I can be well enough to go........ I almost can't wait! I've missed them alot. They remind of wine-filled Ithaca summer nights.

So I really want to clean up my credit. Today I opened a savings account over the phone and actually put money in it. I'm intimidated by the task but I really really want to do it. I wish I knew who to call for help with something like this. I looked on the internet but there is so much stuff and apparently some of those companies aren't legit so I'm pretty much on my own. I guess first step is getting copies of my 3 credit reports and going from there.

I decided that after all this cancer business is over, I need to change my life. Be more proactive, more independent, more responsible. It's not that I was unhappy, I just wasn't satisfied.

It's weird because I look out the window (I have a view of the freeway) and I see all these twinkling lights, of cars and homes, and imagine all those people living their lives, with all the love, sorrow, anger, and joy that comes with living. And here I am, here we are, in this hospital, living ours the best way we can. And I look around the room that is mine for the next two weeks and I wonder what I'll go through here. And I think of others who have lain on this bed and been grossed out by the garlic creamed corn smell. I think of my poor brother at home, laying in bed all scraped up and probably in a lot of pain. I wonder what he's thinking right now.