I got as far as a title but then I fell asleep!
So today is Day +4. I don't even know how to explain what the last 10 days have been like. They weren't joking about bringing out the big guns. Everything pretty much from Sept. 15th (a Saturday) to about Sept. 21st (a Friday) is really hazy. I was sooooooooooooooooooooo sick. Like dying a slow and painful death with razors sick. I couldn't keep anything down. And it wasn't like hungover throw up, it was like green bile and insides rearranging themselves throw up. I know, TMI. So they kept me drugged up most of the time but of course I didn't realize it then. It's only now looking back at it that I realize I don't remember anything but sleeping and throwing up. My mom was with me almost the whole time and she told me it was pretty bad. At some point I gave her my cell phone and told her I didn't want any contact from anyone. But she let Clay and my sister know why I wasn't picking up.
My nausea isn't as bad anymore but now I have mouth sores! I think sometime during the hazy period they put me on one of those IV nutrition things and I'm still on it, now because my throat is killing me and I can't eat or swallow anything more substantial than applesauce.
It's weird because I'm happy I'm feeling better, mouth sores and all, but it's still nowhere near being ok yet. But it's better than the nausea period........... One kinda cool thing is they gave me this thing where when I press it, morphine comes out for my throat pain. I still can't eat anything but the concept is cool.
It's so weird. It's like I can't believe I was that sick. But I was. And I was pretty loopy through most of it. But I'll remember snatches of memory and they'll remind me I was that sick just a few days ago. And today my doctor even talked about when I would get to go home, and I'm like, I'm not even eating and drinking on my own yet, how can we even talk about when I'm going home?? It was weird.
Anyways........ I'm kinda tired now so I think I'll take a nap. My mind sometimes feels foggy still.........
It's funny because my doctor said I actually had extreme side effects to the chemo. Of course I would.......... I almost smiled.................
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
I was starting to worry about you. I'm glad you are starting to feel better. Imagine if you didn't have internet. No one else seems to like Pooch Cafe like I do I'm noticing.
We love you with all of our hearts!!! Please keep eating, and do whatever you can to get out of the hospital healthy. We are dying to going to visit one of the wonders of the world....THE WATTS TOWERS...so we need you well to give us the grand tour. PLEASE send me your mom's and sister's number, I am not going to go thru this shit again of not hearing from you.
We love you always and forever!!!
YOUR MY FAVORITE!!!!
Adriana, Gilberto, Manolo and Sheba Muzquiz
Mary I worry, say something so I can know how you are doing. You are forcing me to have to call you soon.
Update: Ok I called and your mother answered the phone. My spanish isn't too great, but she told me how you are doing. I'm glad to hear you are going home soon, but I'm sorry to hear how sick you have been feeling. At least you know you have a lot of people thinking and praying for you.
Post a Comment